A Tribute to Father's (part 2)

I fear I am going to post pretty infrequently this summer. With Jeff home from school and the summer being so gorgeous.. I haven't been "off" during the summer in years and it's just too great to pass up!

Well... we're now way beyond Father's Day, but everyday is still an opportunity for a tribute. I just read a post on my cousin's blog all about my father, which made the tears stream down my face, but it also led me to remember how lucky I am that my family has a wonderful husband and father that we cherish everyday.

When my dad got sick I was at a crossroads in my life between daughter and future wife. Throughout college I consulted with my dad on everything. Everyday I had a reason to call and sometimes no reason, but I was extremely dependent on my dad. He was my sounding board for everything and as I got older it got better as we could go to dinner or to the bar and grab some food and drinks and just talk about business and marketing strategy for hours. I felt this battle inside of myself when he was sick.. I was torn during decision times - do I figure this out within myself and consult just Jeff, my future husband or do I bring my dad in, because a) that's what I've always done b) he's ALWAYS right and c) will he scoff later if I don't, because I didn't make a good decision? But he'd also get annoyed when I asked advice and then did the opposite of what he suggested.

Once I got married it was much easier to rely on Jeff and to put my trust into him wholehearted and wow it's amazing how timing works, because I didn't really have a choice. 1 month and 8 days after my dad walked me down the aisle and gave me away to my husband, he passed away. Now almost 2 years later it is still surreal to me that my dad isn't a phone call away. And everyday that passes by I am more and more grateful for Jeff who is always ready to help me and offer advice and be my sounding board. And he has a marketing mind! I love that. He gets so excited when he sees campaigns that need a new tag line and he's good at it. So good that we have a few pitches we're going to make.

The week that my dad died Jeff was absolutely unbelievable. I never knew our relationship could be so soft and compassionate... it's just not what we are on a day to day basis, but he just knew what I needed. He'd never experienced much death and he was in the room when my dad took his last breath.

We got pregnant with Kelsey just a couple of months after. Things were a bit rocky up to that point and we had actually decided to wait at least 6 months to start trying again, because we needed to figure us out first. Go figure was the phrase for a while... we found out I was pregnant 3 days later.

Everyone else seemed to know there was a connection between grief and procreation, but apparently I was the last to figure it out. I'm not sure if it's entirely because it fills a void or because it's the circle of life. Regardless, being pregnant while grieving is a pretty difficult time. Jeff was extremely patient and tolerant.

I knew going into my marriage and having a baby that Jeff was an amazing father and I knew we parented similarly because of Julia. While there are many stresses and hardships surrounding a complex family and step-parents and children, one absolute positive aspect is that there's no questions when it comes to how you'll parent together.. you've already had practice.

Jeff is an amazing father. It seems so lame to say that and it's been said so many times about so many dads (who I'm sure ARE all amazing), but how do you put it into words.. there just isn't enough.

He makes the girls laugh, he plays, he reads, he teaches them new things, he's persistent, but gentle. He assumes the responsibility and has no qualms about alone time or bed time or feeding time. He LOVES being a dad and we are so lucky to have him and I am so lucky to have him.